Revised as of
11 Feb 2023
Well, it’s just me, myself, and I sitting here at the computer, typing away. For myself, I love working with my computer, doing research, writing posts, editing books, and more.
There’s the shibboleth that using I myself is redundant. It’s not. It simply emphasizes the distinction between self and others” (Harbeck). The biggest problem with using myself — besides the grammar police — is that people tend to see it as the writer or speaker being pompous or snobbish.
All pronouns, there are situations in which one is preferred over the other.
The Real Problem Comes With Me and I
Many people confuse the object me with the subject I, especially when used in conjunction with another pronoun or someone’s name. We were taught in school to always use and I when speaking of someone in addition to oneself. Only. That doesn’t work.
Marie and me are going on vacation next week gets corrected to Marie and I are going on vacation next week, and it is correct. It happens often enough and we begin to think we should never use “Marie” and me. Ever. Except that Maria and I are the subject of the sentence.
If . . . and me were the object of a sentence, one might say Mom told Marie and me to get ready for school.
The Easy Method of Determining Me versus I
In spite of loving editing, I do hate certain aspects of grammar and figuring out what the object is of a sentence is one of them. The easiest method I’ve found is to try them both out alone in a sentence. It will quickly tell you which fits better.
| Jamie and I were off to school that morning. | I was off to school that morning.
|
| If the kids and I pack for Disneyland tomorrow . . . | I pack for Disneyland tomorrow . . .
|
| Just between you and me, I think Mary is seeing someone else. | Because “between” must be followed by a plural, substitute we or us.
Just between us, I think Mary is seeing someone else. |
| Me and the kids are heading out, honey. | I am heading out, honey. There’s a reason why the plural subject begins this phrase: the kids and I. It does make a colloquial kind of sense. Just something to keep in mind when doing dialogue. |
| Yeah, buddy, you and me are gonna go a round. | Never use a subject pronoun and object pronoun together.
. . . I am gonna go a round. See the colloquial comment above. |
More on the Subject of Me, Myself, & I
There’s an interesting analysis of myself versus me by Arnold Zwicky at the Language Log, and James Harbeck posted a useful one on “Myself, I don’t see a problem“. Bryan A. Garner’s “LawProse Lesson #174: Me, Myself, and I” is handy too.
Grammar Explanations is . . .
. . . an evolving list of the structural rules and principles that determines where words are placed in phrases or sentences as well as how the language is spoken. Sometimes I run across an example that helps explain better or another “also known as”. Heck, there’s always a better way to explain it, so if it makes quicker and/or better sense, I would appreciate suggestions and comments from anyone on an area of grammar with which you struggle or on which you can contribute more understanding.
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| Me, Myself, and I | ||
| me | myself | I |
|---|---|---|
Satisfy Me is Rainer Halama’s own work and is under the CC BY-SA 3.0 license, via Wikimedia Commons. |
All by Myself by Irving Berlin is in the public domain, via Wikimedia Commons. |
Sign language I is courtesy of Tlusfa and is in the public domain, via Wikimedia Commons. |
| Part of Grammar: | ||
| Pronoun, first person singular in the objective case | Reflexive Pronoun in first person singular (also check out the Intensive Pronoun)
In general, don’t use myself unless you have already used I or me OR you’re confused as to whether you should use me or I. |
Pronoun, first person singular in the subjective case |
| Refers to the person that the action of a verb is being done to, or to whom a preposition refers
Used by a speaker to refer to himself or herself as the object of a verb or preposition
[Informal] Used in exclamations |
[Reflexive] Used by a speaker to refer to him- or herself as the object of a verb or preposition when he or she is the subject of the clause
[Emphatic; used to emphasize the speaker] I or me personally [Literary term] I |
Refers to the person performing the action of a verb
Used by a speaker to refer to himself or herself |
| Examples: | ||
| Do you understand me?
Wait for me! Hi, it’s me. Hey! You have more than me. I’ve got me a job. Dear me! Silly me! It’s not the proper style for someone like me. |
I was hoping Ed would go to the movies with me, but in the end, I went by myself.
I was saving that for myself! I hurt myself by accident. I strolled around, muttering to myself. I myself am unsure how this problem should be handled. I wrote it myself. Myself presented to him a bronze sword. It was done by myself. I did it to myself. I’m not myself today. It’s not the proper style for someone such as myself. James and myself were asked to step in. |
Accept me for what I am.
I’m going to the store, Mary. James and I were asked to step in. |
| History of the Word: | ||
| Old English mē, accusative and dative of I, is of Germanic origin and related to the Dutch mij, the German mir (dative), from an Indo-European root shared by the Latin me, the Greek (e)me, and the Sanskrit mā | Old English me self, from me + self (used adjectivally).
The change from me to my occurred in Middle English. |
Old English, of Germanic origin and related to the Dutch ik and the German ich, from an Indo-European root shared by the Latin ego and the Greek egō. |
C’mon, get it out of your system, bitch, whine, moan . . . which words are your pet peeves? Also, please note that I try to be as accurate as I can, but mistakes happen or I miss something. Email me if you find errors, so I can fix them . . . and we’ll all benefit!
Satisfy your curiosity about other Grammar Explanations by exploring its homepage or more generally explore the index of self-editing posts. You may also want to explore Book Layout & Formatting Ideas, Formatting Tips, Grammar Explanations, Linguistics, Publishing Tips, the Properly Punctuated, Word Confusions, Writing Ideas and Resources, and Working Your Website.
Resources for Me, Myself, and I
Apple Dictionary.com
Harbeck, James. “Myself, I Don’t See a Problem.” The Week. 11 Jan 2015. Web. n.d. <http://theweek.com/article/index/255044/myself-i-dont-see-a-problem>.
Zwicky, Arnold. “Someone Like Me, Someone Such as Myself.” Language Log. 5 Sept 2005. Web. n.d. <http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/002458.html>.
Pinterest Photo Credits:
Woman in Blue Reading a Letter, an oil painting by Johannes Vermeer, is in the public domain courtesy of Rijksmuseum and Girl at Mirror by Norman Rockwell was photographed by Marcos Millar and is under the CC BY-SA 4.0 license. Both are .via Wikimedia Commons.
